Punjab Grill by Jiggs Kalra Juhu Restaurant Review

When you reach Punjab Grill by Jiggs Kalra at Juhu's Gulmohar Road, the first thought that comes to your mind is what is a bouncer doing right at the entrance? After all, this isn't a pub or a shady discotheque where you need someone to handle young blokes who've had too much to drink or where visitors are going to sniff cocaine. We walked in sidestepping the beefcake into a girl handling reservations talking on her cellphone trying to look important and busy. She wants us to wait for a half hour or sit at the tables in the outside area. This seems odd considering many of the tables inside are empty. We are just about to walk out when they 'manage' to find space for us despite all the 'reserved' tables.

The decor of Punjab Grill by Jiggs Kalra at Juhu reminds one of those hotels in 1970s Bollywood potboilers where the villain would conduct his racket and Helen or Bindu would shake their booty. Think loud, garish and dated in sharp contrast to the classy interior of Copper Chimney that made way for Punjab Grill by Jiggs Kalra at this Juhu location. As soon as we're seated someone comes forth with compact freshening towels in little plates. They pour a little water on them and we watch it swell in size, an attempt at showmanship.

We ask for regular water after confirming that the water is filtered. Mineral water in these restaurants is sometimes sold at profit margins of 600%. This means you pay 75 bucks for a bottle of water!

The menus are brought quickly. We're here only for the food thankfully as each large peg of Indian made foreign liquor costs more than the whole bottle would if you bought it from a liquor store. We ask for a soup, Sabz Shahi Shorbha (Rs.222.50 after tax) and Jaljeera (Rs.152.50 after tax). Both arrive in less than ten minutes accompanied by a bowl of sliced onions that look older than Dev Anand. The Sabz Shahi Shorbha looks like green vegetable dye and having tried it, we suspect the dye would have tasted better. The soup has a powdery feel to it and the Jaljeera has too much salt. We give up on the soup but ask for the Jaljeera to be replaced and it comes back as bad as before. For the main course we go with Bharta Rawalpindiwala (Rs.413 after tax), which is Brinjal Bharta and also order Tandoori Duck (Rs.1335 after tax). The Bharta Rawalpindiwala is more of a brown paste without any of the look, feel or taste of Baingan Bharta. Jiggs Kalra should visit some Punjabi homes to learn how they make it. We're still looking with disbelief at what their idea of Baingan Bharta is when the Tandoori Duck arrives. It's supposed to be grilled but looks fried. We bite into it and realise it's dripping with butter and cream, reminding one more of soggy movie hall popcorn. We're told Tandoori Duck is cooked in butter and cream after being grilled. These fellas can't cook anything right looks like. To be fair to them the tandoori rotis (Rs.70 each after tax) were done well (and larger than usual) and the papads served with green chutney were fairly edible too but this isn't a value for money restaurant anyway.

If you want to eat out and want to have Punjabi cuisine, there are so many restaurants in Mumbai, some of which offer fabulous food and ambience. I can't see why anyone without a masochistic streak in them would want to go to Punjab Grill by Jiggs Kalra at Juhu. After the meal is done, we're served with a greenish liquid that's described as 'liquid pan'. This is helpful in dealing with the after-taste of all that you've had so far if you really must visit Punjab Grill by Jiggs Kalra at Juhu. As one walks out, the bouncer doesn't seem like such a bad idea after all, for them. If nothing else, to deal with people who may refuse to pay their bills after being disappointed with the food.

Parinda.com reviews restaurants anonymously and pays for all its meals.